Amelia’s Magazine | Snarfle is One: Celebrating Baby, Motherhood and Work

Snarfle by Kirbi Fagan
Snarfle by Kirbi Fagan.

A few weeks ago my baby Snarfle celebrated his first birthday, so now seems like a good opportunity to look back on my first year as a mum running this website: after all Amelia’s Magazine has always reflected what is happening in my life.

Snarfle Sheep Cake by Claire Kearns
Snarfle’s Sheep Cake modelled on one of his favourite fluffy toys, by Claire Kearns.

I know it’s the biggest cliche of all, but nothing, nothing, can prepare you for becoming a parent. So when I was pregnant I made a big effort to prepare only for the birth, imagining that I would follow my instincts like every other mother down the millennia and everything beyond would just fall into place somehow. Sink or swim, right? I read nothing about parenting and bought the bare minimum, instead making good with second hand offerings from relatives and friends. Then all my great birth plans were thwarted… and I was left with a baby.

Snarfle and me swimming
Snarfle was ripped out of my stomach covered in poop, whisked away for tests, prodded and poked, and for the first days kept apart from me in a plastic bed, a huge cannula held aloft in his tiny hand. For the first month breast milk was forced into him via various artificial methods, and yet I instinctively knew I wanted to be as close to him as possible, and soon discovered that the common parlance for this is ‘Attachment Parenting‘. I even started reading a book about it. The world of parenting is rife with differing opinions, but my approach has been to follow what feels instinctively right: I always think about what we might have done for many thousands of years before we had so many gadgets to help us out, believing this to best from an evolutionary perspective. This has meant that I breastfeed on demand and intend to continue until he wants to stop, I carry him wherever I can, we sleep together most nights, I have followed baby led weaning techniques, we are learning baby signing, he wears non-disposable nappies (most of the time) and I have made attempts at elimination communication…

First birthday by Bethany Wigmore
First birthday by Bethany Wigmore.

Those endless baby bits and bobs scared me so much before I gave birth that I could not even look in a brochure, never mind go into a store. So many buggies to chose from! We have a family hand me down but we rarely use it. I was determined to get by with as few purchases as possible, which was probably why we had no clothes small enough for Snarfle when he arrived. He was so tiny that the only sleepsuit that fit properly for the first few weeks was a tiny scrap of material that my mother found in a charity shop. Inevitably, our lives have since filled up with baby paraphernalia.

Snarfle One by Jane Young
Snarfle is One by Jane Young.

Before birth my baby could only ever be an abstract notion: in fact although I have always loved children (and have spent a lot of time being a leader on FSC children’s camps) I never much liked babies – that is, before my own arrived. I had imagined them boring so avoided time with them, and in more recent years they have made me feel a bit sad as I feared I would never have one of my own. So nothing prepared me for the visceral physicality of having a baby: falling in love with this tiny person who is all my own creation, who has remained so closely attached to me as he has woken up to the world. Breastfeeding on demand, co-sleeping (sleeping in the same bed) and baby wearing have helped make motherhood an intoxicating physical experience that I will miss as he grows up and away from me: I now understand why some women are addicted to babies.

Baby Snarfle by Kim Jenkins
Baby Snarfle by Kim Jenkins.

And the love I feel for Snarfle is unquantifiable despite the many hard and tedious parts of being a new mum. Even when rocking him for hours every night (he is not an easy sleeper) I stand there and think: this, this, is amazing. He’s my greatest creative project, this little person who has somehow appeared in this world as though he was always meant to be, perfect, somehow, despite the flaws of his parents, despite his demanding ways. This time, it will be over so soon. I love every aspect of being a mother and feel I have to soak up every moment, for before I know it he will be 18.

Rainbow Cake by Christine Charnock
Rainbow Birthday Cake by Christine Charnock.

I started working again two weeks after Snarfle was born, with him sleeping against me as I typed. We didn’t leave the house until some time later: I was scared about how I would cope with him in the outside world when he seemed so precious and vulnerable. In the beginning getting on with work was relatively easy – he slept so much that I became very good at multi-tasking. But things change rapidly when you have a small baby and this year has passed ridiculously fast, routines constantly shifting to adapt to Snarfle‘s needs. Seen from afar it seems daunting, but you manage, there’s no alternative. Despite the constant tiredness and many small frustrations I have never been bored. I love learning a new skill and this is no exception – I have found the process of becoming a mother endlessly fascinating.

Neopolitan birthday cake by Jo Ley
Neopolitan birthday cake by Jo Ley.

I started work as a lecturer at Middlesex University one day a week in January (I am lucky enough that Snarfle can stay with my parents, so we commute down to their house in South London). This means that work on Amelia’s Magazine is squashed into ever decreasing time slots: currently these include a two hour stretch in the morning (if he sleeps) and after he goes to sleep at night, until I am too knackered to continue. My creativity has gone into overdrive and I have big plans for the magazine yet little time to carry any of my ideas out, but my frustrations are tempered by the knowledge that this time is so short and so precious: even though my mind may drift it is more important for me to be present with Snarfle than building my business. I have at times been jealous of other mums revelling in maternity leave for a full year, but ultimately I feel blessed that I can carry on being a (nearly) full time mum for much longer. I could not have had a child and sent him straight into the care of others – I want to be with him, to watch him grow. To listen to the birds together, help him learn animal sounds and primary colours (his current interests), and tend to our little garden now the weather is warming up. Baby sessions are now full of other mothers who have their own businesses… and lots of childminders and nannies.

Snarfle Oh Baby London space invaders bodysuit
So Snarfle is one year old, and I will continue the juggling act that I have created for myself, for much as I love being a hands on mother I always knew I could not only be a mum; my work will always be important too. I find myself increasingly drawn to the idea of home schooling (to the chagrin of my partner and family) but I don’t know how I would manage it. All I know is that I feel ridiculously blessed by my situation, and so thankful that Snarfle has entered my life.

Snarfle with elephant
I’ve already written about the joy of using real nappies, and over the coming weeks I will be blogging about other specific baby-related things such as baby wearing, breastfeeding, cosleeping and elimination communication. I’ll also be sharing with you the best lesser known clothing brands and makers of lovely unusual toys. I might even share my Quiet Book craft ideas, if I ever finish it. I’m writing about these things because there have been many times when I have scoured the internet, hoping to find more advice and information about my choices of parenting… so if this is a subject that is dear to your heart stay tuned, these writings will be popping up in between my other design focused blogs.

Categories ,Attachment Parenting, ,Baby, ,Bethany Wigmore, ,Breastfeeding, ,Christine Charnock, ,Claire Kearns, ,Co-sleeping, ,Elimination Communication, ,FSC, ,Jane Young, ,Jo Ley, ,Kim Jenkins, ,Kirbi Fagan, ,middlesex university, ,Parenting, ,Quiet Book, ,Real Nappies, ,Snarfle

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Amelia’s Magazine | Snarfle is One: Celebrating Baby, Motherhood and Work

Snarfle by Kirbi Fagan
Snarfle by Kirbi Fagan.

A few weeks ago my baby Snarfle celebrated his first birthday, so now seems like a good opportunity to look back on my first year as a mum running this website: after all Amelia’s Magazine has always reflected what is happening in my life.

Snarfle Sheep Cake by Claire Kearns
Snarfle’s Sheep Cake modelled on one of his favourite fluffy toys, by Claire Kearns.

I know it’s the biggest cliche of all, but nothing, nothing, can prepare you for becoming a parent. So when I was pregnant I made a big effort to prepare only for the birth, imagining that I would follow my instincts like every other mother down the millennia and everything beyond would just fall into place somehow. Sink or swim, right? I read nothing about parenting and bought the bare minimum, instead making good with second hand offerings from relatives and friends. Then all my great birth plans were thwarted… and I was left with a baby.

Snarfle and me swimming
Snarfle was ripped out of my stomach covered in poop, whisked away for tests, prodded and poked, and for the first days kept apart from me in a plastic bed, a huge cannula held aloft in his tiny hand. For the first month breast milk was forced into him via various artificial methods, and yet I instinctively knew I wanted to be as close to him as possible, and soon discovered that the common parlance for this is ‘Attachment Parenting‘. I even started reading a book about it. The world of parenting is rife with differing opinions, but my approach has been to follow what feels instinctively right: I always think about what we might have done for many thousands of years before we had so many gadgets to help us out, believing this to best from an evolutionary perspective. This has meant that I breastfeed on demand and intend to continue until he wants to stop, I carry him wherever I can, we sleep together most nights, I have followed baby led weaning techniques, we are learning baby signing, he wears non-disposable nappies (most of the time) and I have made attempts at elimination communication…

First birthday by Bethany Wigmore
First birthday by Bethany Wigmore.

Those endless baby bits and bobs scared me so much before I gave birth that I could not even look in a brochure, never mind go into a store. So many buggies to chose from! We have a family hand me down but we rarely use it. I was determined to get by with as few purchases as possible, which was probably why we had no clothes small enough for Snarfle when he arrived. He was so tiny that the only sleepsuit that fit properly for the first few weeks was a tiny scrap of material that my mother found in a charity shop. Inevitably, our lives have since filled up with baby paraphernalia.

Snarfle One by Jane Young
Snarfle is One by Jane Young.

Before birth my baby could only ever be an abstract notion: in fact although I have always loved children (and have spent a lot of time being a leader on FSC children’s camps) I never much liked babies – that is, before my own arrived. I had imagined them boring so avoided time with them, and in more recent years they have made me feel a bit sad as I feared I would never have one of my own. So nothing prepared me for the visceral physicality of having a baby: falling in love with this tiny person who is all my own creation, who has remained so closely attached to me as he has woken up to the world. Breastfeeding on demand, co-sleeping (sleeping in the same bed) and baby wearing have helped make motherhood an intoxicating physical experience that I will miss as he grows up and away from me: I now understand why some women are addicted to babies.

Baby Snarfle by Kim Jenkins
Baby Snarfle by Kim Jenkins.

And the love I feel for Snarfle is unquantifiable despite the many hard and tedious parts of being a new mum. Even when rocking him for hours every night (he is not an easy sleeper) I stand there and think: this, this, is amazing. He’s my greatest creative project, this little person who has somehow appeared in this world as though he was always meant to be, perfect, somehow, despite the flaws of his parents, despite his demanding ways. This time, it will be over so soon. I love every aspect of being a mother and feel I have to soak up every moment, for before I know it he will be 18.

Rainbow Cake by Christine Charnock
Rainbow Birthday Cake by Christine Charnock.

I started working again two weeks after Snarfle was born, with him sleeping against me as I typed. We didn’t leave the house until some time later: I was scared about how I would cope with him in the outside world when he seemed so precious and vulnerable. In the beginning getting on with work was relatively easy – he slept so much that I became very good at multi-tasking. But things change rapidly when you have a small baby and this year has passed ridiculously fast, routines constantly shifting to adapt to Snarfle‘s needs. Seen from afar it seems daunting, but you manage, there’s no alternative. Despite the constant tiredness and many small frustrations I have never been bored. I love learning a new skill and this is no exception – I have found the process of becoming a mother endlessly fascinating.

Neopolitan birthday cake by Jo Ley
Neopolitan birthday cake by Jo Ley.

I started work as a lecturer at Middlesex University one day a week in January (I am lucky enough that Snarfle can stay with my parents, so we commute down to their house in South London). This means that work on Amelia’s Magazine is squashed into ever decreasing time slots: currently these include a two hour stretch in the morning (if he sleeps) and after he goes to sleep at night, until I am too knackered to continue. My creativity has gone into overdrive and I have big plans for the magazine yet little time to carry any of my ideas out, but my frustrations are tempered by the knowledge that this time is so short and so precious: even though my mind may drift it is more important for me to be present with Snarfle than building my business. I have at times been jealous of other mums revelling in maternity leave for a full year, but ultimately I feel blessed that I can carry on being a (nearly) full time mum for much longer. I could not have had a child and sent him straight into the care of others – I want to be with him, to watch him grow. To listen to the birds together, help him learn animal sounds and primary colours (his current interests), and tend to our little garden now the weather is warming up. Baby sessions are now full of other mothers who have their own businesses… and lots of childminders and nannies.

Snarfle Oh Baby London space invaders bodysuit
So Snarfle is one year old, and I will continue the juggling act that I have created for myself, for much as I love being a hands on mother I always knew I could not only be a mum; my work will always be important too. I find myself increasingly drawn to the idea of home schooling (to the chagrin of my partner and family) but I don’t know how I would manage it. All I know is that I feel ridiculously blessed by my situation, and so thankful that Snarfle has entered my life.

Snarfle with elephant
I’ve already written about the joy of using real nappies, and over the coming weeks I will be blogging about other specific baby-related things such as baby wearing, breastfeeding, cosleeping and elimination communication. I’ll also be sharing with you the best lesser known clothing brands and makers of lovely unusual toys. I might even share my Quiet Book craft ideas, if I ever finish it. I’m writing about these things because there have been many times when I have scoured the internet, hoping to find more advice and information about my choices of parenting… so if this is a subject that is dear to your heart stay tuned, these writings will be popping up in between my other design focused blogs.

Categories ,Attachment Parenting, ,Baby, ,Bethany Wigmore, ,Breastfeeding, ,Christine Charnock, ,Claire Kearns, ,Co-sleeping, ,Elimination Communication, ,FSC, ,Jane Young, ,Jo Ley, ,Kim Jenkins, ,Kirbi Fagan, ,middlesex university, ,Parenting, ,Quiet Book, ,Real Nappies, ,Snarfle

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Amelia’s Magazine | An interview with Erika Rier: Amelia’s Colourful Colouring Companion featured artist.

Durga-Slaying-the-Buffalo-Demon-Erika-rier
Portland based Erika Rier is a multi disciplinary artist with a unique vision. I am so glad she entered my colouring book open brief, with an amazing and unusual narrative artwork based on the struggle of womankind. Here she talks about her inspiration, how language and place informs her art, and the joy of homeschooling her daughter.

Portrait-erika-rier
How did you find the colouring book open brief and why did you decide to enter your work?
I’ve been following Amelia’s Magazine for ages and had been wanting to contribute to an open brief for some time but the timing was always off. I’d even got a sketch together for the That Which We Do Not Understand brief but was in the middle of a time sensitive project that prevented me from getting my submission done. When I saw the colouring book brief I was so excited. I swear I get at least 2 messages a week from people asking that I do a colouring book. I haven’t had time to draw a whole colouring book but I could definitely manage the two pages for this brief!

Til-Death-spread-Erika-Rier
What inspired your piece and how does it tie in with ongoing themes in your work?
As soon as I read the brief I knew that I wanted to draw some sort of stand-off between the two pages. I wanted the drawings to work together as a whole but to also work on their own as well. In my self-directed work, I have been exploring themes of violence, war, and struggle. The idea of a standoff definitely played into the themes I’m currently obsessed with. I also draw a lot of strange creatures, women who are half bear or have butterfly wings as well as centaurs and satyrs. I decided one side would be winged creatures facing off against land creatures. While I was working the piece it came to me that the two main figures were obviously at some point best friends, but things had gone south and now they’re battling it out on these two cliffs.

Kitty-Mommy-erika-rier
How has your crafty upbringing affected your current approach to illustration?
I come from a family filled with textile enthusiasts so from a young age developed a passion for sewing, embroidery, and knitting. For a long time I created a line of handmade clothing which I sold in NYC and stores around the country. I love the texture, colors, and patterns in textiles and those are what influence my illustration and drawing the most. I love bringing the flat, repeating patterns of textiles into my drawings, creating landscapes made up of repeating patterns.

I think the biggest thing I’ve gotten from my history of labor intensive craft work that I bring to drawing is patience. Threading a loom or hand stitching a quilt are massive, patience-sucking undertakings that have helped me develop the ability to stick through a very detailed drawing and to spend most of my days sitting at a desk creating work.

Sit-Still-erika-rier
What does your series Of Monsters & Women explore?
Of Monsters & Women is an open ended, loose series I’ve been working on for most of the year. I’m not even sure when it started, me drawing monsters and battles but now it seems to be the entirety of my self-directed work. In the most basic way these pieces explore struggle. They depict scenes of hybrid creatures and women in battle, often over trivial things. The series is exploring the internal turmoil I experience in my daily life as a woman, mother, and human. I’m also very interested in pushing against the trend in pop culture art of women being depicted as very passive and empty in pretty portraits. Life is full of battles and struggles but art depicting women seems to be all vapid stares, sexy poses, serenity, and/or maternal softness. I want to create art that shows the part of being a woman that is a battle between one’s self and one’s culture.

Rest-Area-erika-rier
Why are you learning Norwegian?
When I was very little, my grandmother whom I lived with, had a friend who visited regularly from Norway. She somehow sparked a strong desire to go to Norway in me. I’m not really sure what it is that I find so fascinating, pictures of it remind of where I grew up on the very Northern tip of the state of coastal Maine. I started learning the language so I could visit there but ultimately, after moving around America so much, I feel as though I’d like to live abroad especially in a country where English is not the primary language. I’ve also been learning Spanish because I like the idea of Peru as well. Norwegian though, has totally captured my imagination, I’ve never been so excited about learning a foreign language since I started learning it. The words are at once so familiar and so crazy sounding that I can’t help just saying random sentences just to hear them spoken.

The-Escape-erika-rier
Can you tell us anything about the children’s book you are working on?
Yes! This book has been a long time coming for me. It started with a funny name my daughter called herself when she was very little, the Crispiest Turtle. That name just stuck with me, I wrote it down and doodled some characters of it. She also told me a very enchanting story including a seagull and some very unfortunate whales and octopus. I’ve had a difficult time deciding exactly how to write the story but have finally finished a rough draft which pleases me.

Turquoise-is-for-Protection-erika-rier
You create dream artwork and family portraits to order, what have been the most memorable commissions? (I want one, such a great idea!)
I love creating custom artwork for people, I learn so much about them and their families. One of the first family portraits I did is still one of my favorites. The woman sent me pictures of her family and pets and then a stream of consciousness list of things that were meaningful to her family such as goats, poetry, elephants, mangoes, Hindu goddesses, unicorns, feathers…. The list was quite long but I managed to fit in everything, except for the goats. Another one was a woman who asked if I could read her favorite book and do a drawing of some of the creatures from the book. I just received a new commission to illustrate a story a woman has written for her boyfriend. When it is finished, she’ll have a single copy made and bound to give him for his birthday.

And-the-Boat-That-Goes-erika-rier
Why have you moved so much and what is your favourite bit of America?
I was born in Northern Maine and since then have lived in Vermont, Connecticut, New York City, Arizona, Washington state, and currently reside in Portland, OR. I move for many reasons, it started just to get away from my tumultuous family. Since then it has developed into a desire to experience new places. Lots of people love travelling but I kind of despise travelling. I feel like it gives you such a superficial, romantic view of a place. I love living in a new place and learning all of it’s intimate details. There are also practical reasons. We recently left Washington state and a big part of that was wanting to live someplace with a better public transportation system. I never learned to drive and Portland, OR is much easier to get around without a car.

New-Day-erika-rier
How do you fit everything in around family life and how does being a mother inform your work?
It is really hard to fit in everything so there are things I let slide, like cleaning the apartment or having a social life. Right now my family and my art are the most important things in my life so I focus mostly on those and let the other things slide. Attachment parenting has been the thing that I feel like makes my current life possible. My daughter is 12 now and homeschooled. She is a patient, focused, and self-directed young woman and I really feel like attachment parenting is to thank for that. The first 5 years of her life were hard, all I really did was parent, I did draw and sew still but not like I can now. That time I put into attachment parenting has paid off tenfold and helps me to pursue art while raising my daughter the way I’d like to raise her.

Being a mother affects my work so much it’s hard to even tease it out of the whole. Being a mother has changed how I look at the world and how I look at myself. The struggle to bring up a child who can survive in this crazy society but has not lost her magic is the biggest battle I wage everyday. Trying to figure out when to protect my child, when to let her wage her own battles, when to expose her to the ugly parts of life, these are all things that make up my real life battles every day and seep subconsciously into my drawings.

Many thanks for such an informative and interesting interview Erika! I love that my open briefs attract artists from all over the world as well as artists closer to home. Look out for plenty more international talent in Amelia’s Colourful Colouring Companion.

Categories ,Adult Coloring Book, ,Adult Colouring Book, ,Amelia’s Colourful Colouring Companion, ,Attachment Parenting, ,Coloring, ,Coloring Book, ,Colouring Book, ,Crispiest Turtle, ,Erika Rier, ,Homeschooling, ,interview, ,Motherhood, ,Of Monsters & Women, ,OR, ,portland, ,That Which We Do Not Understand

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